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By Mark Karlin

If you're a mafia kingpin and you authorize a "hit," the feds will nail you for murder if they can prove the case.

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 Ask Zoe


BuzzFlash is pleased to announce its first "Ask Zoe" column, answering readers' questions about challenges that they face in social relationships because of their progressive values.

Send your questions to This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..

We will be posting "Ask Zoe" from time to time.

A Cruel Cousin

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Your vote decided it, and you thought Dick Cheney was the Most Evil Republican in our first annual BuzzFlash Sour 16: Republican Race to the Bottom. With 65% of the vote, Cheney downed the Supreme Court Federalist Foursome.

The Four played great defense but they couldn't withstand the bombardment of evil that just kept coming at them. Despite his pudgy frame and his lack of heart, Cheney never really sweated, though the Four gave it their all.

When Cheney was asked for comment after he took the championship, he grunted and grumbled and perhaps mumbled something about wishing he still had access to his secret assassins.

link to a larger version of the bracket

The road started way back with the original 16. Sure you complained that Sean Hannity and James Dobson didn't make the cut. And you howled when you learned that Michele Bachmann was a #3 seed yet Ann Coutler was a #4 seed.

But you were thrilled when Alberto Gonzales pulled off the first round upset. You were shocked that Bobby Jindal and Sarah Palin did so poorly, getting blown out by Bill O'Reilly and Rush Limbaugh, respectively, in the first round. You couldn't believe that the Supreme Court Federalist Foursome survived past Tom DeLay, George W. Bush, and Karl Rove.

But 15 exciting games later, we have a champion. And Cheney deserves his accolade as the Most Evil Republican.
Along the way, you cheered and booed. And you voted. Lots of votes. We literally couldn't have done this tournament without you, the fans.

Congratulations to all who participated, whether you were with us from Day One or just vote in the title game. Once again, congratulations to Dick Cheney, 2009's Most Evil Republican. As for the other evil Republicans, don't worry. There's always next year.

Results from Week 1 and Week 2 of Round 1.

Results from Round 2 and Monday's semifinals.

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We had to recount the votes in one of the tightest races outside Minnesota, and it came up the same way each time: the Supreme Court Federalist Foursome, who already had edged out George W. Bush, narrowly downed Karl Rove with 53% of the vote. Rove, otherwise known as Bush's Brain, came into the contest as a #1 seed and came out more like Bush's Brain Damage.

So is the Supreme Court Federalist Foursome the team of destiny in BuzzFlash's Sour 16: Republican Race to the Bottom? Is this a Cinderella story? Well, not a beautiful princess story, but four portals of evilness, more like the RATS (Roberts, Alito, Thomas, Scalia) that were turned into horses in the Cinderella story.

They have one more task to take on, and perhaps it's their most challenging foe yet. The prince, king, and duke of evilness; Darth Vader in the sort of flesh; Dick Cheney.

Cheney handled Rush Limbaugh, no lightweight himself with ease, with 73% of the vote. Unlike the Court Four, Cheney has had an easy road to get to the final match. In fact, 73% of the vote was by far the lowest score Cheney has achieved to date in the tournament.

The championship is underway: Supreme Court Federalist Foursome vs. Dick Cheney. Your vote determines the most evil Republican. Voting goes until midnight, so get your votes in. No Diebold machines are involved, so your votes are safe. If nothing else, it ought to be a closer match than the battle of North Carolina and Michigan State.

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Well folks, we’ve reached the Fallen Four. Where once there was a Sour Sixteen and then an Elitist Eight, we're coming down to the worst of the worst this week. In case you haven't been paying attention, BuzzFlash has been thoroughly enjoying the honor of giving basketball fans as well as those who could care less about college basketball's March Madness their own bracket to fill in and their own players to root against. 

It’s the BuzzFlash Race to the Bottom, and you've tuned in just in time to catch the beginning of the end! For a round up of last week's games, where heavyweights George W. Bush, Alberto Gonzales, Bill O'Reilly and Ann Coulter got run out of town, click here. You can also read up on week one here and the entirety of round one here. To see the original description and full bracket, click here.

But the focus for these players is the future. Because these competitions are the last before the final throw-down, we've decided to launch two games today and to extend voting through Tuesday night so everyone can weigh in.

Even though Dubya's out of the picture, the men who landed him in office and who pulled his strings once he got there are still menacing us.

Game one pits the extremist arm of the Supreme Court against Bush's Brain. The SCOTUS Federalist Foursome have their fingers in every aspect of American life, and their longevity combined with their ability to quadruple-team opponents makes for almost an unfair match. However, it would be downright foolish to underestimate Karl Rove, the mastermind of the neo-conservative propaganda system. Which will be able to "hang tough?" Whose black scuff marks will be harder to erase from our great country?

The other game in this round could be referred to as The Great Scowl-Off. Dick Cheney and Rush Limbaugh are facing off as a pair of jowly mugs only a mother could love. Cheney might have the advantage of pure, unadulterated evil on his (dark) side, but Limbaugh is still limber, with a much greater reach throughout the league and undeniable star power. Will it be the man behind the curtain or the spotlight hog that advances on to the final round?

You know these men. Each in their own way is qualified to be the worst of the worst. But remember: Any given Republican, any given day could come out victorious. So vote now, and be sure and stay tuned through Tuesday night to see who will be in the final "Bottom Feeder" competition.

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By Donny Shaw

BuzzFlash Note: BuzzFlash fully supports the "New Way Forward" movement to fundamentally change the finance/banking system in the United States and to punish those who made our taxpayers pick up a $2 trillion tab for fraud, abuse and greed. Citizen protest is a vital part of a vibrant and progressive democracy. Join the "New Way Forward" demonstrations on April 11th.

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We are down to the Fallen Four in our BuzzFlash Republican Race to the Bottom. We had a feeling this week's contests, motivated by the honor of reaching this echelon, would be sufficiently intense as to keep you on the edge, wanting more.

The highlight of the week clearly was Wednesday, when George "The Decider" Bush had his fate decided by you, the voters, and ousted in a climatic juggernaut by the Supreme Court Federalist Foursome 53%-47%.

This letter in the BuzzFlash mailbag captured the raw emotion expended in consuming this battle:

I am sitting here at 1:15 AM, in complete shock by the results of tonight's game. It now appears that the #2 seeded Decider has been defeated in his attempt to reach the Fallen Four. I sincerely believed that he would have no trouble defeating the #5 seeded Federalist Four.

Oh sure, the whole world knows how they overturned the will of the voters and appointed him to the throne, but that was only one crime. Just look at all of the corruption, incompetence, deception, and illegal unconstitutional acts that he was responsible for in the eight gloomy years that followed. I was so confident that he would make it to the Fallen Four. There must be some way that we can electronically get these vote totals switched.

Let's see, what did I do with that phone number for Diebold...... or whatever they're calling themselves now???
The other Fallen Four winners had an easier time. Despite Alberto Gonzales looking even more foolish than normal, he was no match for the evil stare of #1 seed Karl Rove. In Monday's contest, Rove slammed Gonzales with 88% of the vote.

The other #1 seed, Dick Cheney, also scored 88% in his second-round match, though on paper, Bill O'Reilly's loud presence on the court was thought to be more worrisome against the out-of-shape Cheney. But when you're Darth Vader in somewhat-living form, you don't have to rely on your outside shot.
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Welcome to Round Two, Game Four, of BuzzFlash's Republican Race to the Bottom. Here's how to play: Vote for the worse of the two contenders on the left. Vote by marking the circle next to the contender you dislike more, and click "Vote." A winner will be declared at midnight tonight. (If you can't see the poll, please upgrade to Internet Explorer 8, or try Firefox)

The winner will advance to the third round of the Sour Sixteen (as one of our Fallen Four), with a chance to become this year's worst conservative. Click here for more about the Race to the Bottom. Click here to see the full bracket, which you can fill out to play along at home.

Don't want to miss a game? Join our e-mail list for daily updates.

Ann "Slander" Coulter v. Rush "The Bloviator" Limbaugh

Ann Coulter has fought hard to get here. John Boehner proved to be a tougher match for her than the experts expected. Her last-minute 3-pointer -- where she used her sharp elbows to get a better position -- was the difference maker, 54%-46%. Fortunately for her, Coulter's next opponent isn't nearly in as good a shape as Boehner is.

Rush Limbaugh had an easy time with the rookie Sarah Palin, 80%-20%. Despite her clearly dominant basketball skills, the sweaty glands and heavy breathing from Limbaugh proved to be too much of a distraction. His inside game was apparent as he dominated the paint. Well, he covered the paint, completely.

There won't need to be wind tunnels in the arena when Coulter and Limbaugh do battle. The hot air will flow back and forth. Coulter has the crazy outside game. Limbaugh has the egomaniacal inside game. Which blowhard will advance to battle the extremely evil Dick Cheney? Your votes decide!

April 2 Result, Shocker: The Supreme Court Felonious Four Knock George W. Bush Out of BuzzFlash Republican Race to the Bottom Contest --Eking Out a 53% - 47% victory to advance to the next round of the BF March GOP Madness Tournament.

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Wednesday, 01 April 2009 07:19

Know Thine Enemy

Who Do These Guys Think They Are?

Who Did This? 

the World Economic Meltdown, Brought To You By ...


Hometown treatment of Joseph Cassano, AIG-Financial CEO who's probably the top villain of all in the global meltdown.  Highlights: His "retirement" deal when fired a year ago is still secret; he made at least $315 million. He cut his chops in the 80s S&L scandal under the tutelage of Michael Milken.

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Welcome to Round Two, Game Three, of BuzzFlash's Republican Race to the Bottom. Here's how to play: Vote for the worse of the two contenders on the left. Vote by marking the circle next to the contender you dislike more, and click "Vote." A winner will be declared at midnight tonight. (If you can't see the poll, please upgrade to Internet Explorer 8, or try Firefox)

The winner will advance to the third round of the Sour Sixteen (as one of our Fallen Four), with a chance to become this year's worst conservative. Click here for more about the Race to the Bottom. Click here to see the full bracket, which you can fill out to play along at home.

Don't want to miss a game? Join our e-mail list for daily updates.

George "The Decider" Bush v. The SCOTUS "Federalist Foursome" (Roberts, Alito, Thomas, Scalia)

It doesn't get much more exciting than this match up, in which the country's worst "Decider" in history confronts the nefarious black-robed team -- weighing in from the bench, admittedly, but for life -- the powerhouse team whose own Bush v. Gore decision actually gave the "Decider" the highest office of the land as his play lot in the first place.

In Round One, Bush put up 81 points against Sen. Mitch McConnell's disappointing 19. Thanks to repeated slamdunks by #43, unrestrained by checks or balances or an aggressive Fourth Estate, it was "Mission Accomplished" almost from the first jump ball, leaving a heckuva legacy for future players to clean up. After littering the court with a warming globe, terrorists afoot, world economic meltdown, and extreme international diminishment, the player wearing jersey #43 won't soon be forgotten, or forgiven. 

And yet, the four most dangerous names in "justice," Roberts, Alito, Thomas, and Scalia, are poised to change the game's fundamental rules going forward. They're young and could dominate the big leagues for decades. If that doesn't make them fearsome, what would?

The SCOTUS Federalist Foursome already knocked out what one fan called the man "who singlehandedly established and controlled the most corrupt Congress in U. S. history," aka Tom DeLay, in a 73-27 blowout. Team Captain Roberts, aka The Chief, is best known for faking to the center, then going right, but Scalia and Thomas were at the far right side of the court already. While playing along and also inclined to dribble right, Sam Alito famously claimed he could be an impartial referee (don't give him a whistle and striped shirt if you want an honest game, however).

The SCOTUS Federalist Foursome have stood firmly together in support of torturing their opposition. Soon we'll see who's got the real staying power. Can Bush #43 take the bruising the Federalist Four favor dishing out, or will The Decider dominate the Federal Foursome in Round 2? Your votes decide!

March 31st Results: Yesterday, Dick Cheney Trounced Bill O'Reilly 88% to 12%.


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